15 quid down the drain (literally)

Today I bought a £15 bottle of Gordon's Gin (good shit) which was like a litre, and it fell out of bag on the way home and smashed on the ground outside

sad face.

Leeds-bound

Getting a train from Gloucester back to Leeds soon (where I study).
This is what I plan to do when i get home:

1. Say hi to Kane.
2. Get that bitch Kane to make me a brew, because he's my bitch.
3. Emphasise how much of a bitch he is.
4. Enjoy my cup of tea.
5. Go to co-op buy some overpriced food.
6. Play COD.
7. Finish unpacking my suitcase.
8. Maybe a little bit of revision/porn.
9. Bed.

Tribute to... Paul Gardner

As I sit in my house on my own procrastinating and searching for anyway to avoid finishing my Cross Cultural Management essay, I bring to you a new additon to 24BC. This addition will be tributes to all the people I hold close to my heart. These tributes will hopefully consist of pictures of the person at their best and worst (most likely stolen from facebook) and maybe some sort of memory I have of that person. Proabably just photos though.

Today I pay an unlikely tribute to Paul Gardner.

If you aren't fortunate enough to have met Paul, when and if you do he will probably drive you around in his old beat up car listening to the creepiest music he can think of purely to make you feel uncomfortable. If you feel like getting drunk with Paul then you must watch out for the intense headbutts he gives anybody in his eyesight, because apparantly he feels no pain and doesn't care who he hurts in the process. He will probably then proceed to roll around on the floor for the remainder of the night.

Here are some pictures of Paul at his best: Notice how he puts 100% into every single pose.

Some late presents

Apologies if the raunchy image in my last post didn't fulfill your christmas wishes, so heres a couple presents to compensate..

Firstly, as I'm home in Gloucester- a place unknown to most of you, I thought I'd share with you some kind of insight into Kane and myself's birthplace. One day I'll construct my own description of "GLAWWW-STURRR" but for the time being I really can't be assed, so here's someone elses valid take on the place:

http://www.chavtowns.co.uk/2004/08/gloucester/comment-page-1/

Secondly, with England's recent snowfall (to become less of a rarity in the future as David O'Boyle continues to contribute to global warming each time he rides his Barbie bike, thus leading to more erratic weather patterns etc) I thought it would be apt to share with you one of my favourite youtube videos:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0_rcnPgrlj4

Merry Christmas from 24BC

P.B.F.

Kristie Stanley's (Kane's sister) response to Peanut Butter Farts dotcom:

"Is that smooth or crunchy?"

http://www.peanutbutterfarts.com/

COD Quotes

Well it's Christmas, which means I have been completely alone for the past 4 days. Fellow flat mate/24BC writer Nicholas Rose took the train to Gloucester on Sunday where he is probably sat on his sofa eatinig crisps and watching the Sopranos repeats as I write this. Unfortunately for me I have been at work for the majority of the christmas period and only get the chance to go to Gloucester for Christmas day and boxing day. With the absence of Nick the living room has become cleaner, and the house has become colder (yes David I have turned my heating off during a large snowstorm). Not having Nick around isn't all great though.

When Nick is around I spend some of my time sat on our sofa watching him play Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2. He is unaware that I listen carefully to the immense shit talking and weird quotes that come out of his mouth, and have gathered but a few of his quotes to share with you all.

1. Claymores on this game are kind of shit. I think they’re pretty good

2. Fucking dickhead, i’ll shit in your mums mouth innit.

3. Everyone here is gay except for me.

4.(in reference to the rocket launcher glitch he discovered) Fuck you and your skill, I’ve got noob...ness

5. Fuck your mum




Merry Christmas Everyone!
and a special merry christmas for Aaron Cleveland, Andrew Wheeler and Dustin Collins who will most likely be in tears in a couple of weeks when Zach, David, Nic and Jake all come to the best continent on Earth for a semester.

A Poem by Simon from Sweden

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I wanna fuck you with a rake.

'Next Blog'

So yesterday I noticed a button at the top of this blog which links you to another random blog on Blogspot.com

..and yeah i clicked it.

So far all it has cropped up is mostly crap which is a shame. This crap is predominantly either people who like cars/motorcycles too much, or people who are so cheap they not only use blogspot instead of buying their own web domain, but they make jewellery to sell. Surprisingly alot of people do this which is quite sad because you can buy crap jewellery from Argos and I'd hate to think they're losing business. I'd link you to an example but it shouldn't be too hard for you to find one yourself.

But if you sieve through the crap you will occasionally find something that you like, or find a blog so shit that it's funny. Which leads me to the purpose of this post; I'd like to introduce another ongoing feature to 24BC. Through utilisation of the 'Next Blog' button I will present on occasions a link to another blog on blogspot, because evidently we're too lazy and untalented at 24BC to cough up enough material to keep you entertained ourselves.

To kick it off I leave you with 'Carrie White Burns In Hell' which is a blog compilation of weird videos:

http://carriewhiteburnsinhell.blogspot.com/?expref=next-blog

Inparticular check out the one of the green man:

WHY DYA WANNA KYLLL MEEEE???!!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watchv=FXDQrnoqSXo&feature=channel

David?

Not News Story of the Week

Surely the ginger xmas card thing is more worthy?

News Story of The Week

Throughout the years, the much anticiapated Christmas #1 has brought some musical lows for Britain. This list includes:
Mr. Blobby- Mr. Blobbby (1993)
Bob the Builder- Can We Fix It?(2000)
The Spice Girls (1996-1998)

After many years of hilariously bad Christmas #1 songs, one would think the British public would have learned their lesson. Unfortunately this is not the case, with X Factor winners snatching the Christmas #1 spot for the last 4 years running.

This year could be very different.
A facebook group is calling for its members to purchase a certain single in order to knock this years X Factor winner out of the lead. The single is...

Killing In The Name Of- Rage Against The Machine (1992)
It should also be noted that the current #1 song in Britain is indeed Killing In The Name Of

Catch the full story here: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/8413557.stm

Santa loves all children, even ginger ones

Saw this silly bitch with her children on TV today. Shes so ashamed of her hair she dyed it brown, then has the cheek to go on local news complaining about a christmas card that reads the inscription "Santa loves all kids. Even ginger ones".



http://www.yorkpress.co.uk/news/4792246.Mother_snaps_over_ginger_joke_Christmas_card/

Barnsley had something to cheer about

We were at this game. United won 2-0, but Barnsley did score one goal...



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7MfO_ZEyRvU

Procrastination

- refers to the deferment of actions or tasks to a later time.

Omegle

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hii
Stranger: hi
You: m/f?
Stranger: m
You: oh good
You: im female ^^
Stranger: oh r u horny
You: yeah a tiny bit
Stranger: wanna do cyber
You: uhm ohkay ;)
Stranger: u go first
You: ok so i just finished a late shift at the tootthbrush factory
Stranger: hey babe
You: and im coming home all tired in my red fiat
You: when i see a roadblock and have to take a detour
You: which takes an extra hour for me to get home
You: so when i get home im too tired for your small dick
You: cant be assed
You: sorry mate
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Skype

David O'Boyle and I have been communicating mainly through skype since my departure from America.

Ever since we both discovered that skype was the most efficient way of communicating from different continents, our conversations have always ended the same way. It still puzzles me how/why David decided to spring this on me one day, but in a joking manner (hopefully) he told me to "mstrb8" in a disturbing way. This has now become somewhat of a traditional way to end all conversations, with each of us sharing equally weird ways to "mstrb8."

I have collected many of these conversation enders and wish to share them.
Make a note that David was the main contributor to these:


- mstrb8 into nick's jam

- oh an mstrb8 while nick's gone

- masturbate in the shower and plug up your drain

- mstrb8 to pictures of black girls with ultra pink baginas

- mstrb8 on some chicks 80085 or b00bs

- Mstrb8 to the cod. while on the mic.

- Mstrb8 in the library... and then jizz in my hand and wipe it across tables where people are sat.

- Mstrb8 on the till at work

- Mstrb8 into a drink to cure your hangover

- Mstrb8 on the paper you write on. Then turn it in. With a sperm signature

- Mstrb8 to economist magazine

- Mstrb8 to the teachers goodbye speech



I'm sure there will be more of these in the future as we become more immature with age.

Special kudos for David for saying "baginas"

Omegle

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: hey
Stranger: from?
You: pakistan
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

420 Pics

Co-operative Special!

As typical students living in the recent crime haven that is Burley Park, Nick and I decided to take our daily trip to the Co-op for some chocolate and bread. I was extremely excited at the sight of this 420 and was fortunate enough to borrow Nick's camera phone to capture the moment.

Unfortunately my digital camera has seen its last day so it may be a while before I capture more 420's. Hopefully it will be replaced soon.


In other news David O'boyle has recently informed me that he happily declined drinking with his friends (and his party hard neighbors) in order to watch the most well known chick flick of all time...
Gone With The Wind (238 minutes)

Me in a Lederhosen

Enjoy with a fresh tube sock.

Omegle

A week ago Kane forwarded me a link that had been passed to him by David O'Boyle;

Omegle.

so fast,
so easy,
so simple,

never before has trolling the internets been so easy.

Applying the theory that no females are on the internet against a population of hopeful cyber-sex-hungry males who deny this theory, is always going to end in one-ended heartbreak and one-ended laughter. Yes i pretend to be a female, but not always.

Sure, there are guys that expect you to have a webcam and pictures of yourself and all I can cough up is a Google image search of a big hairy man but there are some that you can string along for the ride.

It may seem sad to some but I find it hilarious and that's what matters. But of course I do enjoy sharing laughter with others on occasions which is why I plan to blog my experiences. After all I believe that human beings that actually sit at their computer, and bestow upon strangers the disgusting slug that is the human penis via webcam, warrant me wasting their time. You could call me a vigilante of the internet.

My only hope is that one day I will be just half as great and as talented as the king himself- Bloodninja. Here is some of his work:

http://nerve.fugacious.net/drf/archives/cybersexchatroll.htm


And so I bestow upon you a taster of more to come...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
Stranger: asl
You: 17 f california
Stranger: 17 m new york
Stranger: u got pics>
You: yes
Stranger: can i c them?
You: no
You: im fat
You: i dont want you to see them
Stranger: cmon please
Stranger: ill go on my webcam
You: unless you like tubby girlz
Stranger: yea i do
Stranger: :)
You: im 20 stone
You: 300lbs
Stranger: send me the pics :)
You: :(
You: sorry
Stranger: why not
You: i did take pictures but on polaroid
Stranger: ill jerkoff on cam 4 u
You: and i got hungry :(
Stranger: do u have a webcam babe?
You: i ate my webcam too
You: my fridge was empty
Stranger: ok shut the fuck up, ur probably a guy
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

http://omegle.com

Allah Ahkbar BOOM!

So I found this glitch on Modern Warfare 2 which basically turns you into a suicide bomber and now can't stop laughing every time I play it.

If you own a copy and want to experience some LOLs and possibly a good kill/death ratio then learn here:



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h0-nYVHyQWc

420 pics

To start the 100% robbed idea from our fellow scummy American friends, I introduce 420 pics to the blog. 420 pics was originally going to be a twitter documenting everything I see that says 420 on it, because it is cool to smoke w33d and even cooler to take pictures of things that relate to w33d. Fortunately I realised that twitter is uselss and shit so my hunt for 420 has a home at 24BC.
Here are some 420's that I have seen lately.
Photo credit to Kristie Stanley for capturing a photo at our local Boot's shop.

2009AD

Kane and myself through jealousy and our own desires to write about such awe inspiring subject matter as Aaron Cleveland and Andy Wheeler have started our own blog.

Im pretty sure little to no one will ever read it but we feel its our duty to dilute the internet with even more shit.